I know for a fact that I would be awful if I was built like Serena Williams or Jennifer Lopez.. If I had a body remotely close to what they have, I would be a terror. My ass would cause me to do really inappropriate and rude things. I'd be so ridiculous that people would be able to pick my labia out of a lineup. I'd wear zero clothes any- and everywhere, every day. I'd show up at church rocking a denim thong and a cropped T-shirt and have the nerve to sit right next to the head usher and dare her to say anything to me. And if anyone did say something to me, I'd tell them, "Jesus blessed me in many ways, and I am just showing off His works. HALLELUJAH." People would be disgusted and appalled by me and I wouldn't care. All insults would bounce off my ample backside. To whom much is given, much is required, and I'd require that my much would be given nary an inch of fabric. I'd hire a band whose sole job would be to follow me around and play theme music for my yansh, based on the mood I was in.. I might opt to walk backwards into any room I entered, because why not?.. I might also declare my booty its own limited liability corporation, assigning myself as CEO and chairman of the Donk. My jeans would be tax-deductible business expenses, and I would add my ass to my LinkedIn profile's Skills section. Everyone would throw hate ration in my dancery, and I wouldn't even see it, protected as I would be by the throne I sat atop. Luvvie Ajayi
I have something I need to tell you, " he says. I run my fingers along the tendons in his hands and look back at him. "I might be in love with you." He smiles a little. "I'm waiting until I'm sure to tell you,...
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Veronica Roth
I love you like a fat kid loves cake!
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Scott Adams
Love can change a person the way a parent can change a baby- awkwardly, and often with a great deal of mess.
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Lemony Snicket
When God Created Mothers"When the Good Lord was creating mothers, He was into His sixth day of "overtime" when the angel appeared and said. "You're doing a lot of fiddling around on this one." And God said, "Have you read the specs on this order?"...
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Erma Bombeck
And next time you're planning to injure yourself to get me attention, just remember that a little sweet talk works wonders.
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Cassandra Clare
More Quotes By Luvvie Ajayi
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Some well-meaning folks think if we stop talking about racism, it’ll magically disappear, like the smell of an errant fart. But like a fart, people might try to be polite and ignore it, but everyone knows it’s there. Avoidance has never been a great tactic...
I know for a fact that I would be awful if I was built like Serena Williams or Jennifer Lopez.. If I had a body remotely close to what they have, I would be a terror. My ass would cause me to do really inappropriate...
We have more ways to get our news than ever, which is supposed to be a good thing, because more competition is supposed to challenge you to do better. However, in this social media age, what is has done is allowed the information business to...
